Trump was Right or They go Low but We Make Jokes?

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Not another commentary on the White House Correspondents Dinner, yeah, just a short one. Cause I do have a couple things to add to the mishegoss.

I know  you all heard about Michelle Wolf disparaging Press Secretary Sarah Sanders looks. Well, actually she didn’t and that’s enough of that [but wait, are we as women warriors so fragile? The woman’s face displays all the anger, rage and contempt that her boss has for us.]

You may have missed some of Wolf’s other points and many of them were significant. The current state of comedy is in fact all I have to hold onto. It’s where I learn to find perspective on the true state of our country.

She picked on the one part of Trump’s identity that is subject to shame and that is his supposed wealth. We can guess that their are two good reasons that the fake president does not want his taxes released. The most important of which is that they will show what a poor businessman he is, what a loser who started out with millions, looks like when he has to go to money launderer’s and vile dictators for loans. She said, “Trump is so broke he had to borrow money from the Russians and is now susceptible to blackmail and possibly responsible for collapse of the republic, yay.” Not the funniest joke but the best thumbnail analysis of the mess we’re in.

“But it turns out that Trump is the one pussy you’re not allowed to grab….he said it first, remember?” So while I hate the use of the term pussy to describe something that is weak since that so obviously isn’t true, in this case the use of it is brilliant, it’s a triple entendre, I think.

“Trump is racist though, he loves white nationalists which is a weird term for a Nazi. Calling a Nazi a white nationalist is like calling a pedophile a kid friend.” Great line to illustrate how we have softened the ways we describe the most vile people on the planet.

Her comments about Wall Street were perfect and described succinctly how our government colluded with financial criminals, thieves who have never been punished.

“Although I haven’t been sexually harassed [referring to her time working at Bear Stearns in 2008,] I’ve definitely been fucked. That whole company went down on me without my consent…and no men got in trouble for that one either.” Bada boom! Sexually explicit, not really but wow, pretty descriptive. With Michelle, the last throwaway line is always the kicker.

“Chappaquidick in theaters now” for instance reminds us of the ironies of our changing values. It refers of course to the ouster of Senator Al Franken in a moment of self-righteous panic. Think about how the discussions that are going on in the Senate now [if there any] would’ve looked if Franken were still there and try to hold that in your brain while you ponder what health care would’ve looked like without Ted Kennedy. But don’t think about it too long, you’ll get vertigo and end up “under a tree” hehe.

Did you miss this one, “You guys are going through cabinet members quicker than Starbucks throws out Black people, but don’t worry they’re having an afternoon, that’ll solve it.”

There were some jokes that while I couldn’t help but laugh, also worried my sense of political correctness like those about Mitch McConnell’s neck or Paul Ryan’s missing balls, probably cause I tend to think of having balls as having no sense but charging ahead anyway. That line was good for this crowd though since it gratified some while enraging others or maybe not-last throwaway line on him-“Yeah, bye Paul.” Does anyone even care anymore what that prick does? Oops.

To the Dems referring to the midterms, “You’re somehow gonna lose by 12 points to a guy named Jeff-Pedophile-Nazi-Doctor…oh, he’s a doctor?”

On Ivanka, since no one has freaked out yet on her picking on the First Daughter, I’ll remind you, “she’s done nothing to satisfy women-I guess like father like daughter….pause while they gasped…”oh you don’t think he’s good in bed, com’on.”

On the Handmaids’ Tale, “Mike pence if you haven’t seen it you would love it,” ok that’s VP Pence in a very small nutshell [do I feel a pun coming on, nah, I’ll leave that to Colbert. He loves dick jokes.]  download (6)

She had excellent put downs of every cable news station and one beloved network show that takes itself way too seriously. You could figure out what is happening on This Is Us without any dialogue if all you did was listen to its lugubrious soundtrack. And then she got to our beloved Rachel, “watching Rachel Maddow is like going to Target. You went in for milk but you left with shampoo, candles and the entire history of the Byzantine Empire.” Is it possible to write a better critique of what went wrong with the Maddow show?

“And of course, Megyn Kelly. What would I do without Megyn Kelly…ah probably be more proud of women.” Boom.

You probably heard the comments she made on how the media gave us Trump and why they don’t cover anything but him, best lines, “You guys are obsessed with Trump. Did you used to date him? Because you pretend that you hate him but I think you love him.” Nailed it.

images (2) Ending with, “Goodnight. Flint still doesn’t have clean water!”

After which Trump tweeted that the the WHC dinner “is dead as we know it.” In the interests of keeping the press alive, I have to agree. The need for access and “civility” that only flows one way, the obscene comradery between celebrity reporters, CEOs and the Trump crime family all swishing out in their designer finery has absolutely nothing in common with reporters who eke out stories in our local papers or even TV reporters who have to carry their own cameras much less those of us who follow and investigate the news for nothing after Wall Street emptied the press rooms around the towns, cities-and  the foreign offices where people die trying to get their story. download (7)

Speaking of that, Dana Milbank excoriated Ms. Wolf the day after, saying that instead there should just be a ceremony eulogizing the journalists who died in the line of duty. Yeah, lots of folks will watch that, Dana [are you sad cause your mom named you that?] Yeah, and those of us out here who know we are under attack from this regime, experienced a cathartic moment hearing the truth told by this squeeky-voiced lady and we deserve at least that.

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 Medics carry an injured woman to the ambulance at a hospital after a suicide attack in Kabul Photograph: Mohammad Ismail/Reuters

But if you desire civility with Nazis and in any way see yourselves on the same side as them, we don’t. It’s not an existential threat. That’s way too pretty and removed from what we’re experiencing-the list is too long to enumerate-it’s a very real threat. We don’t want to work alongside those who would destroy our environment, our rights, our families, and our hope.

Lest we get lulled into a stupor by the horror of it all, we need a regular dose of affirmations like this, succinct clear representations of what we are up against and why we need to continue resisting it all. You can say Michelle was mean but I felt the love. It radiated over the tops of the heads of the bourgeoisie all the way to the children of Flint. Those of you “clutching your pearls,” can grow a real pussy.

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Contradictions R Us

Design by Rha Bowden, "Co-Exist"

Design by Rha Bowden, “Co-Exist”

It’s head exploding time in these United States and maybe in Venezuela, too. As Rachel Maddow declared it’s another day “in which all of this news does not seem possible.” I started writing about about the various and opposing views of Hugo Chavez who just died and whose legacy is being discussed on the social media and the MSM (mainstream media), but social media, as usual, is more interesting and more nuanced.

But only just. Being “friends” with so many folks on the Left or at least left of center, wherever the hell that is now in times of challenging women’s right to birth control and the right to vote for folks who waited for hundreds of years before even getting to register, I have read a lot of tributes on my news feed. Then a bunch of disagreements started to pop up and as one wag, radio critic, Matthew Lasar wrote, “Hugo Chavez was a wonderful monster who destroyed and saved Venezuela, which will never recover from his life/death.”

Now I am not, I repeat, not, an expert on Hugo Chavez but I did admire his chutzpah and his ability to completely change the conversation in Venezuela and around the world. As the first person of Native and African origins to be elected in his country, he gave the populace who looked like him a reason to hope.

He told the world that the most valuable resources of his county, oil, belonged not to international corporations, but to the people of that country. He thumbed his nose at baseball owners who were used to running a plantation system where young players were treated as commodities not people.

He also shut down newspapers and went after opposition press. He spent his country’s wealth on literacy and health clinics AND goodies for his friends and family(so they say). For Americans, for whom the MSM’s version of a dictator or strong man who terrorized the (wealthy) newspaper owners who fomented  (funded) a failed coup against him, he wast billed as both scary and a clown. Well, if the first image didn’t work to belittle him, the other surely would do the trick.

For many of us regular viewers of the MSM who don’t read the Nation as often as we watch cable news but hated Bush-he was a breath of fresh air. When he told the UN, “Yesterday, the devil came here. Right here. Right here. And it smells of sulfur still today.” Well, Mastercard, that really was priceless.

Now that he is gone, no matter what he did or did not do, many of us fear for his countrymen and for the help he lent to other countries. But we have enough problems dealing with our own politicians and the policies of two parties beholden to corporate CEOS and their boards.

Now along comes Rand Paul and more head exploding politics, personalities, and contradictions. I listened to part of his filibuster against possible murderous drone strikes in the US on KPFA. Rand Paul on KPFA should have been enough to hurl me into migraine territory much less the fact that I found myself nodding along with him.

When I later caught Lawrence O’Donnell on MSNBC haranguing against Paul’s long speech and describing him as a mad man, I got more confused and bewildered. Then O’Donnell asked his guests to join him in berating the “stark raving mad” Paul; but they declined and went on to talking about the president giving out his secret list of terrorists who may be killed (Ryan Grim, HuffPo) and bringing attention to the use of drones (EJ Dionne). Then we got to hear Republicans like John McCain and Lindsey Graham denouncing Paul for implying this president was that horrible??

At that point I had to finish eating my whole day’s ration of chocolate before my brain shut down. This morning I read that Eugene Robinson agreed with Rand Paul and almost went into a coma writing it (I’m only imagining that).

At least Eric Holder has now stated that no, we won’t be doing that unless of course there’s a little caveat to that statement like, unless necessary. I never even got the wonderfulness of drone attacks in other countries against people without my grocery-store-surfing-third-world-exploiting-talents-and passport-owning-non-burka-wearing-music-downloading rights who might be attending a wedding with the wrong entourage, never mind the bad bridesmaids dresses. I never really felt good as an American about our apparently god-given technologic advances that are making this all possible.

It seems that now some Americans are waking up to a few of these new threats. Back to facebook and twitter, and tumblr, and whatever else they invented last night that I haven’t found out about yet, there’s Bradley Manning and Aaron Swartz, and, oh for those of us in the Bay, KPFA’s contradictions could fill, well, many a book-as they already have.

One thing I want to know though. If we voters elected Barack Obama, he of the brightest smile since JFK, and of the drones, and the I-could-cut-a-little-out-of-your-social-security-checks for the sake of the deficit which happened because people are out of work , which happened because the investment bankers ponzied us all out of a living, not our greedy grannies and grandpas buying their cat food; if we (yes, this is the definition of a run-on sentence) could vote for him because we recognized the scariness of the other guy or just because the other guy wore mom-jeans, then why can’t we learn to live with the contradictions??

I, for one, maybe you for another, don’t want to be caught using all my energy hating a president the way I did in the 60’s who turns out to have been probably the best one in my lifetime. After all, LBJ gave us Medicare and food stamps, and the Voting Rights Act which we may now be losing.

I don’t want to be in long arguments against a now dead president of a country I have never visited.

I don’t want either to read about my mayor (you knew I’d get around to that) and wonder  if she were either a head breaking, proponent of police violence or a criminal-coddling-cry- baby-liberal, neither of which comes close to the person I know who has ably engineered a budget that has maintained our libraries, youth and senior services through a deep Recession.

What’s my point-ferkrissakes-how would I know while my head explodes?!The only guess I have would be that these are tough, volatile times. They come close to the polarization of the 60’s which means I am now too old to be trusted anyway. Sometimes I don’t trust myself so I have to back up, study a little more, write it all out or paint it or whatever works and then be responsible for what I say, write, and do, how I am in the world.

I need to figure out how to live with the contradictions of loving my president while fearing his power, his mentors, and his isolation from people like me. I need a place to mourn the loss of a charismatic leader who spit in the eye of the world’s most powerful states. I need to listen to my enemies and, more importantly, resist the need to have enemies and the desire to have heroes.

By the way, Happy International Women’s Day!